All couples have a black streak in a relationship. Sometimes you are happy. Sometimes sadness covers you. Both states are absolutely normal. But if you get to the point when it seems to you that you really hate your partner, then, apparently, it's time to pause.
Hatred is a very strong emotion, and we know from childhood that hatred should not just appear in relationships or in family life. What to do if you are sure that you hate the person who was promised love to the grave?
Concentrate on what you like.
People tend to talk about hate when they generally say they are unhappy. Usually they talk about hate from despair or just to increase the effect and emphasize the intensity of their emotions. Although some people do experience hate feelings and think about divorce, the word “hate” itself usually gives the opposite reaction.
Do you feel forgotten in a relationship?
Tip: focus on what you like about your partner. A man cannot only be bad or only good. Think of his positive qualities, and then the situation will not be seen only in black and white light. And if there are more positive traits than negative ones, then you may overestimate the situation.
Determine your role in the current situation.
The feeling of hatred and hostility arises when there are problems in communication and not only between you and your partner, but problems in communication with yourself. Before pointing your finger at others, look at yourself first. Have you discussed your problem with a partner? What is your share in this issue? Do not take it, somehow, that only you are to blame for the situation. You just have to present the whole picture. Maybe you forgot to tell your partner about your discontent, so it only intensified.
But if you really tried to talk, express your feelings, but to no avail, it is not surprising that you are experiencing negative. If you say the same thing as a broken record, but do not see any effort on the part of your partner, then this can serve as a warning signal. If the partner’s behavior has not changed, plan how to end the relationship.
Find out what's really going on.
Sometimes we are so fixated on the feeling of hatred that it blinds us, and it is difficult for us to objectively judge what is really going on. Perhaps you are just mad at your partner. If your emotion is anger, then you need to try to understand where it comes from and what the solution to the problem might be.
It is very rare that hatred flashes from scratch, so it is very important to find out the reason for this feeling.
Understand what other emotions you are experiencing.
It is extremely rare for a person to experience only hatred and nothing else. Often behind hate lies anger, and behind anger is pain. Emotions like sadness and disappointment usually stand next to pain. Therefore, it is important to understand how you came to this feeling.
Usually a woman is not programmed to feel anger or hatred. The appearance of these feelings is the first sign that there is a problem and it must be solved. Since childhood, women are taught to be pleasant, happy and to hide their feelings within themselves. You should not worry much about your strong emotions, but you shouldn’t let them eat you from the inside. Hatred scares, only when you do nothing to understand where it came from in you. Starting to analyze your feelings is the easiest way to see clearly and objectively where your relationship is.