Society believes that a woman, in order to become happy, will certainly need to find a suitable man and get married. Fortunately, modern women have become independent enough not to rape themselves with marriage, in which everything is completely out of plan, and have learned to leave the problematic relationship. In addition, many women today and do not seek to tie the knot, which is very surprising to others. What are the reasons for this? We talked about this topic with our expert Marina Dokuchaeva.
The first possible reason is a traumatic past experience. If the woman was already married and the marriage was unsuccessful in every sense, a stereotype was fixed in her head, the thought that it would be just as bad. It is a prohibition to marry oneself because one does not want to experience that grief, unhappiness, and suffering. Convince yourself that a new relationship can really make her happy can be very difficult. Sometimes after one unsuccessful marriage, women are lonely for life.
There is such a thing as an ingrained habit of being alone, and it is characteristic not only for men. It’s not like old maidens, but there are many male bachelors and many female bachelors. In this case, the woman has meetings with the opposite sex, relationships and feelings, but also - that ingrained habit. For example, if a “bachelor” in 40 years of age gets married, this is a kind of way out of the comfort zone. We do not want to leave this zone, because we do not know how it is there, outside, and we are not comfortable.
Independence and the fear of losing it
Now women have a very high level of self-sufficiency, they are successful in their careers, successful in their psycho-emotional development, spiritual, professional, and, as a result, in social terms. Such a woman does not see a man with whom she would be interested. It is for itself the back, which can be relied on, and shoulders, on which you can dump any weight and feel quite comfortable.
There are women who can not decide in life. You know, there are people who choose things in the store for a long time to eat a restaurant. There are the same people in search of their ideal. At some point we understand that we are losing too much time in our lives, we understand that we are disappointed and have not found this ideal.
Do not create yourself this ideal. Because there are no perfect men, just as there are no perfect women. We ourselves are not perfect, and we must accept this.
Do not want to marry - this is normal. Do not try to follow all the rules that dictates society. We must always build on our internal request: do I want to marry now? Am i ready But maybe I still need to give up all my strength to pursue a career? Maybe I want to get married after 35?