We all had dating experiences: good and bad. Sometimes it seemed to us that everything was going well, but over time we were horrified to realize that we had chosen the wrong person and did not treacherously discern the negative sides in him.
Sometimes, we listen to our friends, who so confidently insist on meeting one person or another, that we automatically program ourselves into it. Or maybe the reason is completely different. Anyway, do we wake up once and ask ourselves, when did our chosen one change for the worse? How could we miss the alarm bells?
According to numerous studies, the divorce rate in modern society is critically high. This suggests that we do not know how to choose the “right” person, and do not know how to maintain healthy relationships when we find that one.
Even more sad is that, having made a mistake once, we often repeat the same inappropriate pattern of behavior in a new relationship or in a new marriage.
So how do you know the secret of successful dating and happy relationships before marriage and in marriage? If you are a conscious person who always strives to get to know yourself and others better, then you will succeed. These 4 important tips will help you.
Do not enter into a relationship, simply because it is “time”
People often give birth to relationships for a tick, believing that the “time has come”. We say to ourselves: "I am already 30, it's time to get a family." And we connect our life almost with the first comer. This approach is not the right one and it is he who often prevents us from making the right decisions.
Remove your rose-colored glasses from your eyes and be prepared to receive alarming signals.
Many people have been married for several years, and after it collapses, they admit that nothing foreshadowed any troubles and that they did not notice any negative qualities in their companion.
Meanwhile, the truth is that unhealthy behavior existed in relationships all the time, they simply refused to notice him. “Love is blind” - and this is true in a bad way. So try to look at things without embellishing them and not trying to find excuses for them.
Read articles and stories based on real-life experiences that tell you what to expect in a relationship and how to avoid mistakes.
Learn concepts and skills that will help you navigate in relationships and life in general. For example, how to properly communicate in a relationship or how to recognize healthy and unhealthy behavior.
Without this knowledge and skills, you are walking in the dark, not knowing what you may encounter.
Never be in a hurry: give your chosen one time to show their true character
Watch the behavior of the man for at least 6 months. For such a period it will be difficult for him to hide his true qualities. Better yet, check your man for a year.
You must understand that we all make mistakes, but there is a difference between random “errors” and constant negative behavior. Conversely, random “good” behavior is not a general background of unhealthy behavior. Be an impartial observer and make sound conclusions.