During a divorce, both partners go through difficult emotional stages. But women who are not the initiators of separation are more affected.
Yes, everything is individual: someone can step over several stages, and someone can “get stuck” for a long time on one or even go back a step.
All these stages are not a strict sequence of development of relations in the process of divorce, this is only a general idea of how to treat it and in which direction to go further.
For the first time you will feel pain when you hear from your spouse a desire to divorce. It’s such a strong feeling that you don’t even know if you can handle it. With the help of pain, we kind of send a message to our second half about how badly his decision devastates us.
Bitterness of loss
Sometimes it follows pain. We try to blame the spouse that he is not what we wanted him to be. Many at this stage decide to take revenge in order to inflict the same pain as he caused us.
You will be angry at your spouse, at his desire to divorce, and you will be tormented by the question: "How could you do this to me?"
Despair comes when you realize that there will be no going back, that the spouse is seriously determined to get a divorce. At such a moment a woman will do everything to make him change his mind.
This is an emotionally unstable period: rage can quickly turn into a feeling of the pleasure you have made. You do everything to get it back.
When you realize that nothing has changed, disappointment will come. Divorce will occur regardless of your desires. You actually try all the tools, but you cannot change anything.
After the extinction of frustration remains pain and despair. When you realize that you can't do anything about it.
But still you do not stop thinking about what else can be done. But then despair wins: you understand that you are losing your spouse forever and this is the end of living together with him.
After a strong emotional stress, you will feel completely exhausted and depressed, devastated. And to perform daily routine work you will not have enough energy.
When you are tired of getting tired of suffering, the next stage comes: you are determined to change everything, including yourself.
You are full of determination, you begin to analyze all sorts of options and understand - there is hope. Many have survived a divorce, and you too can handle it. You seem to see the light at the end of a long dark tunnel.
When you understand that a divorce has positive sides, you are covered with joy. Perhaps you got some lesson or made certain conclusions.
It's good that now, and not later, you think. Would I have such opportunities if I were married? Have you decided who your real friends are? If not for loneliness, would you meet such wonderful people? Did you learn about yourself a lot of interesting things? Do you know what kind of relationship you want after this divorce?
Happiness will come after the realization of all the positive aspects of a divorce.
Not everyone can go to this stage, unfortunately. This is reminiscent of Maslow self-realization. At the balancing stage, you understand and accept everything that life offers. You realize that nothing is "bad" or "good." Everything has its own balance of positive and negative.
How a woman experiences her divorce depends on what she focuses on. And at this, the last stage, you are not afraid of anything. You are sure that you can win in any situation and accept all things as they are. Also in relation to men - you accept them as they really are.